Untamed

My life is the inspiration behind all my work.  During tough times, I found I couldn’t journal so I turned to writing as a way of getting things out.  It helped and I continued to do it, never expecting anything to come of it. Starting a webpage or a blog was never my intention, after all, these were my private thoughts.

But, after reading numerous poems online, I discovered that a lot of poets were writing how I felt and their work helped me.. So why couldn’t I do the same?  

I posted a poem on a facebook page and had a message from a couple of people saying that they loved it and that it had inspired them to get up and do something about their situation.  It made me feel good and so I started thinking about writing and posting online.

I have a very dear friend, who will know who he is after reading this.  I have learnt so much from him and I know he is always there for me.  I turn to him with all my problems and think of him as my dad.

Anyway, he asked me why I couldn’t write anything a bit happier…

I had to chuckle. I thought about this.  I can’t write about happy things, because in all honesty, people relate more to other people’s struggles.  It’s nice to read a happy poem, and there are plenty out there, but I don’t get inspired by happy poems, because that isn’t where my head is at.

I need to write down my feelings about a situation that I was in so I can deal with it.  That may take a while, and a lot of my issues now stem back from childhood (who’s doesn’t).

So, it’s relatable for everyone.

Maybe it is also because I suffer from depression and am going through another ‘low’ phase at the moment.  I can see the signs. Not wanting to see people, not wanting to get out of bed.  Feeling nauseous constantly and just wanting to be alone.  So, my mind is constantly drifting back to mistakes I have made or how I’ve been made to feel or how I’ve made others feel.

So, in all honesty, sadness sells.. That’s a shame, but that’s our reality.  Or my reality anyway.